Sorry this is such a long post, but I hope it's worth the read.
I work in the meat department at a Walmart. Because of my work schedule I haven't been able to make it to institute on Tuesday evenings very often. This last Tuesday, I finally had the opportunity. I was off of work at 1:00pm and then I was able to go to my little brothers' marching band competition (the Salem Hills marching band) at BYU. After that I was going to go to my Mission Prep class at institute. The marching band performed at about 4:20pm and they sounded great! I think I was more excited about their performance than I was about any of my own. The people who were sitting behind me can attest to how in to it I was getting. Oh, I was missing marching band!!
There were several Salem Hills alumni there to support the band, some of whom are close friends that I hadn't seen for awhile. One of these was a very attractive girl that I had had a crush on in high school. She's even more beautiful now than she was back then. Well, I got to talk to her and was having a great time. The Salem Hills band is 1A this year and the awards ceremony wouldn't be until after the 5A bands had finished and the BYU marching band had performed, at about 9:30pm. I hadn't been planning on staying any later than 6:30pm so I could get to institute. However, a certain someone (yes, her) was staying, and another friend was inviting me to go get dinner with her and her sister at Panda Express (mmmm!) and I was really enjoying the marching band competition atmosphere. So, ignoring President Monson's words echoing in my head to make institute a priority, I decided to stay.
Well, it was fun, the band got first place, and I got to hear a lot of other great performances, but the night didn't end up meeting my expectations. I only briefly saw that beautiful girl after dinner. And something just didn't feel quite right as I left the stadium to go home. I began to think through my decision to stay and discuss it with my Heavenly Father. Suddenly, things became clear. I have been called to serve a mission. That should be my focus and I need to be doing everything I can to prepare. I hadn't gotten to attend my mission prep class for awhile, and I wasn't sure when I'd be able to again. It was a very foolish decision to act on a whim. I should have discussed this decision with God at the moment when I was making the decision, not hours afterward. As soon as I had done that He enlarged my perspective and deepened my understanding. I would have made the right choice. But instead I made the choice on my own and, as usual, it wasn't the best one.
There was nothing bad about staying to support my brothers and to be with old friends. There was nothing wrong with being attracted to a girl and hoping to spend more time with her. In fact, those may have been good things. But there was something better. Something more important. And I had sacrificed it for something of lesser value.
I had been excited to go to institute this week! President Monson had lowered the age at which you could serve!! I wanted to share my excitement with the rest of the class! Elder Holland had given a very similar talk as the one he'd given in the video we watched of him speaking at the MTC. That was interesting! As the clarity of what I'd chosen hit me I was filled with regret. I would have done anything to go back and change that choice!! I wished I was dreaming! It wasn't a major sin I'd committed, yet it was burning me up! I prayed for forgivness, I promised to learn from this experience and do better in the future. I still haven't completely forgiven myself.
Well, today I felt impressed to try and change my work schedule so that I could go to institute this week, perhaps as a way to make up for last week. Yet for some reason I was scared to try. I'm absolutely certain the adversary was trying to get me to just not worry about it. However, I prayed for courage and that I would be able to make the change. And it happened! I'm going to institute this week! I'm so excited!
Institute has really blessed my life. If you are a young adult, go to institute as often as you can. Make sacrifices if you need to! It is worth it! This is the quote from President Thomas S. Monson that I mentioned above:
“If you are a single college student, I ask you to make
participation in institute a priority. Married students and other young
adults are also welcome and encouraged to attend. Think of it. Friends
will be made, the Spirit will be felt, and faith will be strengthened. I
promise you that as you participate in institute and study the
scriptures diligently, your power to avoid temptation and to receive
direction of the Holy Ghost in all you do will be increased. Divine
favor will attend those who humbly seek it. That is a promise which I
leave with you.”
I have experienced this!! I know it is true! Institute is a powerful tool in the war against evil. It brings strength, increases faith, and brings the Spirit into your life.
Make institute a priority!!
